Aloha,

I’d rather you not see when I mess up, but who needs more perfect Facebook and Instagram posts?  

Well, I hate to do this, but according to James 5 c onfessing our faults to one another somehow heals us.

So here it goes . . .

Ronnie and I got in a fight . Honestly, that doesn’t happen all that much. We have disagreements and feisty discussions, but not many “fights.” I won’t go into the details. Just suffice it to say that it wasn’t a big deal, but it mattered a great deal to me!  

At first I thought he simply didn’t understand my psyche. But after a few exchanges, it dawned on me. We had entered into a full-blown power struggle.   Shocked at my passion, the more we debated the angrier my heart grew and the more intensely I argued my opinion.  

The whole time my mouth defended my case, my brain persuaded my heart I had every right to have my way in this situation.   After all, I didn’t behave or demand like some wives. ( Big mistake.  Remember the verse in II Corinthians about comparing yourself to others? )  

I easily justified my behavior because it wasn’t a major issue, and I refused to let up. My tenacity surprised me. I fought to get my way until eventually he conceded in a whispered voice. “Just do whatever you want”. 

Those words left his lips, and like a heat-seeking missile targeted my heart.   And it sunk.  

I knew I had done wrong. 

In a flash, my victory took off its mask to reveal a laughing curse and a gulf between my two most precious relationships.  

Yes, two — my husband and my God.  Disobeying my husband meant disobeying God.  Technically he gave me permission, but not because he agreed.  

If I chose to leave it alone I would’ve gotten what I  thought  I wanted, but I wouldn’t have been keeping my vow – to love, cherish,  honor and obey.

And the funny thing about it?  Now that I’d won, I wanted nothing to do with it! I begged God to please help me make this right.  

What I learned that day is that submission isn’t based on the issues.  I don’t get to choose which situations I feel most relevant. In fact, the Bible talks about being faithful in the little things. 

No. Submission is about  who you’re submitting to .

In the end, we worked out a compromise. One he honestly believed accomplished the goal, and one I could live with. But at that point, I would have gone without makeup for a month just to be right with God and him.  

Ultimately, I received a fresh reminder of how awful it is to be separated from God and His protection.

When Ronnie came home last night I could sense his curiosity as to whether I had followed his requests. I had. It felt nice.

Amazingly, the thing I once resented, I actually enjoyed!  Why? Because obedience is its own reward. I knew I’d done right and placed myself back under God’s protection. 

With our hearts realigned, my husband could rest knowing he could trust his wife.

Ahh. . . No money in the world can buy that kind of peace and joy!

Hope & Glory! to You ~ Love Rebecca